Loyalty
by DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin
Summary: Sequal to Blinding Light. With Raven gone, Robin finds himself at an impass between loyalty and Starfire. When he gives in to one, things turn upside down and the dead are re-apearing on his doorstep. R&R, (RR,RS)
1. Loyalty

**Loyalty**

**Chapture 1: _Loyalty Shattered_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

**DISCLAIMER:** _I _**DONT**_ OWN, YOU _**DONT**_ SUE!_

**Sequal to Blinding Light, Save Me From Thy Lovely Darkness**

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

_**

* * *

**_

_**Loyalty:**_ **_Staying faithful (the act of faithfulness) to a specific person, duty, etc_**.

Loyalty, something that every being on the earth has to deal with once or more in their lives. To be loyal to something is the most rewarding and wondrous thing that one could ever bestow upon themselves, **_sometimes_**.

There is always that singular draw back: **_sometimes_**.

It's true, only **_sometimes _**will you feel full, loved and complete. There are others where you might feel neglected and, regretfully, alone. Sadly, the second happens more than the first. Of this, a certain Teen Titan can, most definitely, assure you....

* * *

The alarm clock blinked, 3:02 a.m; the lighted numbers casting a red hue on Robin's bare skin. A stern look played across his features as he stared at the wall in front of him, elbows resting on his parted knees as his sweating hands dangled between the gap. With a silent sigh, Robin closed his dark emerald eyes, each one shining with an irregular rouge glow before becoming hidden by his lids.

One year. One year that day, and he was still dreaming of her.

Robin shook his head, his sweat soaked black hair dancing with it. Another sigh escaped his mouth and he glanced over at the beautiful alien beside him.

Starfire's naked body was curled cozily under his covers, one of her pale orange hands resting a top the yellow pillow beneath her head. A soft snore slipped between her rosy lips and Robin felt a weird feeling turn over in his stomach.

Guilt. He mentally cursed and looked away, his eyes glazed and faraway. In a way, he felt angry towards Raven, in fact, he almost hated her. It was as though she had cast a spell on him, a terrible spell that made him feel sick if he even _looked_ at another female. But, he couldn't loathe her forever, after all, he loved her.

Robin gasped and snuck another glance at the girl beside him. No...he had once loved her. How could he continue love someone who was dead? Why should he continue to be loyal to someone who was no longer there with him, and would never be again for that matter. The very thought both angered and confused him. But the most confusing question of them all, was the reason as to why he still harbored the need to do everything he had just stated he shouldn't have to.

Robin inhaled deeply and laid his forehead against one of his palms. It was true, and he knew it. He knew that whether he wanted to believe, or even accept it, he still loved Raven.

With a defeated, slow shake of his head, Robin's shoulders began to shake and tears began to leak from his eyes. He let himself go, for the first time sense her death, he truly let himself go. And he cried and cried.

The minutes slipped by and still the tears came, each one more menacing than the last. Finally, after a draining twenty minutes, Robin was reduced to nothing more that dry sobs and sniffles. Quickly, his fingers curled into fists, the fingers capturing some of the sheets. With no hesitance, he lifted the cloth to his face and wiped the tears away, somewhat ashamed for crying.

At that thought, he couldn't help but snort a laugh. A year ago, he would have considered himself weak for crying, now he found it a relief.

"Robin?"

Startled by the soft voice, Robin glanced over at Starfire, who was now sitting up strait, her green eyes filled with worry.

"Are you alright friend Robin?"

Robin smirked at the alien girls innocence, his eyes skimming over her body. In a lustful, ans selfish need to rid himself of all his emotions, Robin lavished in Starfire's appearance. And for the second time in two days, Raven was instantly shoved from his mind. A moment later, Starfire was being held to his chest, all means of cloth covering her, gone. Without hesitance, Robin pressed his lips against hers and lost himself in his passion. In that position, he lowered Starfire to the bed, leaving behind all thoughts of loyalty and guilt.

* * *

The screeching of an alarm clock woke Robin instantly, and in return for the annoyance, he silenced it with a clenched fist. Seconds later, he had his feet on the floor and was heading for the bathroom. Suddenly, remembrance hit him hard and he turned his head in a sleeping Starfire's direction. 

Yes, this was right, it was right for him to be happy. Robin felt his eyes stretch wide, it was true. He was happy. A small smile stretched across his face at that thought and he continued on his way to the bathroom, a happy tune escaping his mouth in a high whistle.

Cyborg passed Robin in the hallway, his one real eye wide with disbelief. His leader figure appeared to be in a good mood, and that was something to be noticed. Robin nodded a curt hello in Cy's direction before entering the bathroom.

The robot boy shook his head and smiled, his feet heading towards Beast Boy's room. If they were ever going to decide on breakfast, the changeling had to get up.

* * *

**YAY! Chapter 1! Lol, yeah it was sorta short and yeah, i bet a lot of you are mad at me. hides from angry fans but i'm sorry...lol, it has to go this way...anyways...this is FAR from done so bear with me...i'll see what i can do! Anywayz, Review please!**


	2. Cyborg's Pain

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 2:** **_Cyborg's Pain_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

**DISCLAIMER:** **_I DONT OWN TEEN TITANS...I KNOW...I THOUGHT I DID TOO._**

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

* * *

Once breakfast was made and served, Cyborg had wandered back upstairs, his head hanging slightly. It had been disturbing, to say the least, to spot the looks Starfire and Robin had sent eachother during the meal, their eyes bright, their mouths smiling. They had seemed to be hiding something, and the robot teen didn't know if he really wanted to find out exactly what that something was.

A moment later, Cyborg found himself safe in the confines of his room, and couldn't help but connect one of his fists to the wall.

For a long moment he stood there, just breathing, both robotic and real eyes closed.

_'What am I doing?'_

Realization hit him hard and Cyborg pulled his fist away, an indent marking where his knuckles had been. Slowly, he uncurled his fingers and lifted the hand to his head before caressing the back of it. A lone sigh left his lips as he made his was to his bed, his tired form plopping down onto the mattress.

The covers beneath became twisted from the impact but he ignored the annoyance, his eyes focused on his cold metal ceiling. He searched his brain once, then twice, but was still left without an answer to his previous mental question; _What am I doing?_

Cyborg closed his eyes, both hands sliding up the pillow before bending inward, the palms settling under his head. For a long time he laid that way, not fully asleep yet not awake, still trying to decipher the reason for his actions.

An hour later, he was still without an answer. Frustrated, Cyborg sat up and swung his robotic legs over the side of his bed, his elbows settling atop his thighs, his head falling into his hands.

Not a long amount of time passed before he was greeted with the sensation he had become the most accustomed to with, over the passing of a year; tears burned in the rim of his real eye. Feeling totally lost, Cy shook his head, the tips of his fingers clenching the plastic covertightly.

Suddenly, his eyes grew wide, an old memory working its way into his mind. Slowly, one of his hands crept around to the back of his head, the palm pressing loosely against the plastic casing.

_A cloakedgirl stood before him, the majority of her face hidden by the shadow of a blue hood. Her face hosted two sets ofglowering red eyes, onepair atop the other, hermouth twisted down in a darkscowl._

_'Raven.'_

And there was his answer.

Cyborg felt the burning in his eye subside as the clear droplettes rolled down his cheek. He gasped and, with the hand that had been cradling his skull, wiped the tears away. It was far too unlike him to cry, he knew that, yet his body didn't seem to want to accept it. He snorted, a small, sadisticsmile on his face; his body hadn't wanted to accept it for the entirety of ayear, what in the world would make that day any different?

Once again, a river of tears began to flow down his cheek.

"Damn.." He muttered softly, finally deciding just to let them fall, knowing he had every reason to cry.

Nothing was the same. The tower never seemed to be 'warm', it was as though all life had been drained from it. This, Cyborg found slightly ironic, for Raven had never been exactly _warm_ herself. In fact, she had never really been _around _all that much, and when she was, her mood would always be off or unpleasant.

Apparently, the tower didn't eversee that.

Cyborg shook his head, noting the stupidity of his previous thoughts. He knew the tower couldn't feel; but then again...he had always thought Raven couldn't either.

_'Raven.'_

Cy tilted his head, his shoulders shaking as he desperately tried to fight off the sobs; he was failing miserably.

Spite the preposterous thoughts of the tower itself being cold, the atmosphere was definitely icy. Everyone seemed somewhat affected by the passing of their team mate, even if they expressed it in their own ways.

Starfire, spite her own grief, tried to be as cheerful as possible, attempting to lighten the spirits of the rest of the team. When she realized her trying was futile, she broke down herself and began to spend the majority of her time encased inside her room.

Beast Boy, on the other hand, had banished all his pathetic attempts at trying to be funny. In fact, he became so serious that the rest of the group had only become more depressed. Who would have ever thought they would miss his corny jokes?

And then, there was Robin and himself.

They both dealt with the loss the same and yet, entirely different. True, they both cried alone and yes, they both thought of her all the time, but theyalso reacted socially opposite.

Cyborg, had tried to give as much moral support to his friends as possible, where as Robin _hid _himself as much as possible and, was extremely blunt in all of his conversations. The words that came from his mouth were usually cold, the tonedevoid of any feeling whatsoever, and the most disturbingfact of all was that the rest of the group _accepted_ his mood, they didn't _blame_ him for being reclusive. Cyborg, alone, didn't agree.

It was during that period, that he had become barbarically angry with his leader and had even started one or two physical rows with him. Each time, they had both walked away hurt; not only physically but emotionally as well.

Those days were terrible, each one more tense and useless than the last. No one really talked to each other anymore and if they did, it was only during a mission. And even then, their uneasiness showed, as each attack they ever attempted proved weak and notthoroughly planned out.

While those particular times were taking place, Cyborg had thought about leaving the group, but every time he did, he would walk past Raven's room, lay a hand against her door, and wonder about the answer she would give him. Once that was done, he would always rethink leaving and, in turn, stay. Whether it was for her or not, he didn't know.

A sudden knock on his door roused the robotic teen from his thoughts and he glanced over at his door.

"Cy?"

It was Beast Boy, his voice slightly muffled by the metal spearating him from the room. With a shake of his head, Cyborg stood, "Yeah?"

"Robin wants to see you."

Cyborg sighed and rubbed the trails of tears from his face, "Ok."

Beast Boydidn't reply, andCyborg could hear his feet retreat back down the hall. With a final sigh, he headed for the door before stepping through, and starting off in the direction he had heard Beast Boy walk to.

**

* * *

**

**Well, there was chapter two...hope it was ok....i dont like it all that much but hey...What can ya do? Review please!**


	3. Cheating

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 2:** **_Cheating_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

**DISCLAIMER:** **_I DONT OWN TEEN TITANS...I KNOW...I THOUGHT I DID TOO._**

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

* * *

Cyborg entered the living room carelessly, his mind elsewere. Sighing, he glanced over at the couch, only to find Robin staring at him,

"Are you ok Cyborg?" The boy wonder asked qucikly, noticing the red rimming his comrade's real eye.

Cyborg nodded, "Yeah."

Robin returned the head gesture wearily, "Ok."

The robotic teen sighed and made his way over to the couch, his body swinging around the side before his rear met the cusion next to Robin.

"So," Cy started, "What's up?"

Robin smirked and adjusted himself into a comfortable position, "I need you to run the tower today."

Cyborg arched an eyebrow, confusion swimming in the back of his dark iris.

"Why?"

Robin's smile faltered and he looked away, a strange emotion flickering through his masked eyes. It was only a moment before the grin was back,

"I'm taking Starfire out."

Cyborg felt his throat tighten in anger, his eyes narrowing slightly. None the less, he kept quiet, knowing perfectly well that Robin wouldn't take his judgement lightly. The boy wonder had never been good with any kind of negative critisism pretaining to himself.

"Ok." Cyborg answered blandly before standing, his eyes still focused on the young man below. Robin's smile widened and he glanced up at his companion.

"Oh man, I really apreciate it." He replied before standing, one of his cloved hands clapping the robot boy's shoulder, "Thanks a lot." Cyborg nodded, his lips sparing Robin a small smile. The boy wonder smiled back before turning and walking towards the kitchen.

Cyborg's mind swam with one reply, 'Your not welcome.'

* * *

Starfire smiled widely as she stood in the door way, one slightly tinged hand waving in Cyborg and Beast Boy's direction. The two male titans glanced at eachother, an uneasy smile on both their faces before looking back at their other two companions and returning the gesture. Starfire brightened even more before muttering something along the lines of, "O Glorius Blogblas day', and walking outside. 

Robin arched an eyebrow at her recieding firgure before glancing back at his friends, "See ya guys."

Cyborg and Beast Boy echoed eachother, "Bye."

Robin nodded and left, closing the door behind him.

Cyborg's eyes streched wide, his mouth slightly a gape as an old memory swirled through his brain.

_

* * *

A terrifying scream raged through his ears, quickly followed by the sound of dozens of running footsteps. He could only think of one name; Raven. Instantly, his feet joined in on the chorus, his boots flying down the stairs. _

All things blurred as he zoomed past the interior, the sound of his breathing harsh in his ears as he raced towards the entrance door. The footsteps of his fellow titans echoed behind him as he reared past, his thunderus robotic stomps leaving the floor in vile condition.

In a mad dash, he reared around the corner, only to feel his feet sqeal in a loud halt. There, crumple to the floor in front of him, was a shaking Raven.

Her short, violet locks were hidden beneath a blue hood as her glossy eyes stared up at the man before her; Crow.

His lean form blocked the sun that was filtering through the open door, his shadow shading Raven from each and every bright ray.

"Wake up, please...wake up." echoed through her pale lips, each word tinted with intense longing.

"Raven." Crow had bent slightly, one of his gray hands wrapping around Raven's chin; she glanced up at him.

"No...your dead."

The male Azarathian smirked at this acusation, a small nod following, "Exactly."

* * *

Reality slammed back into Cyborg's mind as he flet a set of hands shaking him roughly. 

"Cyborg? CY! Wake up dude!"

The robot teen shook his head quickly before glancing down at the one rocking him.

"What..." he half spoke, half moaned as one of his hands masaged the top of his nose.

Beast Boy felt himself relax and removed his green hands from his friends upper arms, "Man, are you ok?"

Cyborg felt his head clear and he nodded in reply, "Yeah, i think so."

Beast Boy shook his head before rolling his eyes, "Dude, you have to cut back on the video games."

Cy arched an eyebrow, a smirk playing across his face, "Like your one to talk."

Beast Boy barked a laugh, "Wanna?"

Cyborg nodded, "Yeah. Race ya to the living room?"

Beast Boy's game face crept across his features as he bent into running stance, "Dude, your _so_ going down."

Cyborg smirked, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"YEAH!"

Cyborg took off quickly, laughing as he did so.

Beast Boy blinked a few times, before realizing what had happened at chasing after him, his body transphorming into that of a cheeta, "HEY MAN! YOU CHEATED!"

**

* * *

**

**Well, there was chapter three...hope it was ok....i dont like it all that much but hey...What can ya do? Review please!**


	4. Not no, Not yes

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 4:** **_Not yes, Not no_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

**DISCLAIMER:** _I _**DONT**_ OWN, YOU _**DONT**_ SUE!_

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

**_Author's Note: _Oh My Gosh People! I am soooooooo sorry...omg...i really am...I had been grounded from my pc...and when i got back, i had total writer block. Anyways, i think i worked it out, but the writing might be a little blunt in the chapter, so sorry, I intend on fixing this chapter later on and the writers block before the next chapter. Anyways, i hope you enjoy it anyways! Byes!**

* * *

Robin cleared his throat loudly as he cast Starfire a weary glance. She paused in her eating quickly, her face resembling that of a chipmunk's as she shoved another burger past her lips. With a large and not to mention, loud gulp, she swallowed the mass of beef quickly, her cheeks shrinking back to normal size. With an arched eyebrow, she frowned.

"Is there something causing a pain in your throat, friend Robin? You just made the sound of a singing Tasblorg."

"Uh, no Star, I'm fine...Just, " He paused and shook his head at the questioning gaze she was giving him, a small smile gracing his lips, "Just take it easy, the food's not going anywhere."

She smiled brightly, her eyes closed with joy as she pressed her hands together in front of her chest.

"I'm sorry, but these hamburgers are just so delicious."

Robin chuckled, his eyes lit with slight amusement as he glanced down at his own plate. For some odd reason, his appetite had vanished. He looked back up at his date.

"Do you want mine?"

Starfire's smile brightened even more as she nodded quickly, her reaching over the table quickly before capturing the quarter-pounded and pushing it into her bottomless pit of a mouth. She moaned loudly at the joyous taste as her eyes rolled up to the ceiling. With a stretched smile, she began to chew. Robin frowned slightly and turned his masked eyes to the window.

Rain slithered down the glass slowly, the slight mist now a heavy downpour. He watched as people scurried to their vehicles, everything from umbrella's to soaked newspapers shielding them from the weather. A scowl crossed his features; he hated rain.

It seemed that every time the damned clouds decided to empty themselves, bad omens liked to wrap around his ankles and refuse to let go.

It had been raining when Raven had hurt him, it had been raining when Sparrow had killed him, and it had been raining when Raven died.

He cursed mentally, his eyes quickly shifting from the gray outside world to the alien girl before him. Her large, green eyes studied him blandly, her hair draping around the sides of her head like a curtain. Robin banished his reminiscing quickly, his head cocking to the side in curiosity.

"You ok, Star?"

Her eyes snapped up to meet his quickly, her lips parted. She brushed her fingers through her hair, all means of grease wiped clean from them.

"...Do...do you still think of her?"

Robin felt his throat clench, the walls becoming dry as his lips parted in shock,

"N-no...why do you ask?"

Starfire looked away, her eyes tearing,

"You speak words that aren't true."

Robin attacked the lump that was forming in his throat with a large swallow, but it refused to yield, his guilt far too large to let any such means happen. He was a jerk.

He had used Starfire as an object of release, a way to escape his feelings, his pain; And all she had ever done was want him...maybe even love him.

"Starfire...I can't forget her. You know that."

Sparkling greens locked onto his once again, her pink lips, curled downward.

"Do you love me?"

Robin blinked. Everything began to fade, the glaring lights, the voices of the people around them, the table. His eyes grew wider as he felt himself completely slip away, the black swallowing him whole and leaving nothing but his date for him to see.

Love.

Emerald shifted to violet, dark lashes lacing their vast emptiness as shoulder length indigo hair touched lightly at their sides. A blue leotard, mostly hidden by a cloak of said color adorned the body that was once Starfire's. Robin gasped and allowed himself to look upon the face of his long ago lover.

"Raven..." The whispered name flowed out of his mouth as an irregular question, almost as though it was foreign, as if he had never spoken it before. Raven's strait mouth twitched up into a short smile, her amethyst eyes bright with something the Boy Wonder couldn't place.

"What?"

Starfire's voice sent reality crashing back, the black cracking before falling away, the sounds of the smashing pieces filling his ears, bombarding him with an echo of her question. _What, what, what what..._

Robin used one hand to rub his eyes, the overhead lights blazing into them as soon as he regained the memory of where he was. He gazed back in the place where Raven had been sitting, only to meet the face of a very confused Starfire.

"I believe you said something, friend Robin."

His eyes shone with no recollection.

"No...I didn't..."

_Raven..._

"Yes, I believe you did."

"I didn't!"

Robin's head throbbed as he slammed his fists down on the table, causing it to jump, their soda's spilling before rolling off the far side edge.

He new lover's sudden outburst startled Starfire, her cheeks turning red as she caught the curious glances of their dinning neighbors, the contents of her pop soaking into her lap.

"Alright." She replied softly, hiding her rosy face. Robin sighed, realization of what he had done hitting him hard,

"I'm sorry."

"It is ok." The red head replied with a sad shake of her head, her eyes looking everywhere but at him. Robin sat quietly, knowing he should say something, _wanting_ to say something; But the words just wouldn't come.

"I...I thought you did, once." Starfire blurted suddenly, her bright emeralds seeping into Robin's blank stare. He furrowed his eyebrow in utter befuddlement,

"What?"

Her lip quivered violently, her eyes clamping shut as two shinning clear tears rolled down her cheeks. The transparency of those salty drops bothered Robin slightly, the reason unknown. An instant later, Starfire shot up from her seat and ran from him and down the isle, her quick exit sending the front double doors smashing into the outside walls.

The room was deathly silent as all eyes landed on Robin, not a mouth chewing. The Boy Wonder glanced around nervously, his figure sinking down in his seat and he lifted one hand into the air,

"Check please."

* * *

"OH I GOTTCHA NOW!"

"NO WAY!"

Cyborg laughed as his name, in all capitals, blinked across the screen. With a large shout of victory, his controller fell, forgotten, to the floor, and he danced around.

"Best 30 out of 50?" Beast Boy begged softly, his ears drooping slightly as his eyes grew large. Cyborg stopped his solo-celebrated ceremony and looked down at the changeling, not moved.

"No. I beat you, live with it."

Beast Boy only whined before shrinking down into a puppy, his large eyes growing even more in size. Cyborg frowned,

"No."

A sudden rush of wind ruffled the pair's hair, the scent of rain following. The front swung on open hinges, their handles banging into the walls every once and a while. A jet of red flew past and up the stairs, loud cries shaking the room before the sound of mechanical doors closing silenced all.

BB sent Cyborg a questioning glance, his body shifting back into that of a furry boy. The robot teen simply shrugged in reply.

"Hey team."

The duo looked over at their leader, who slouched, almost as though beaten, against the hallway wall.

"Man," Beast Boy started, one hand scratching the back of his neck, "What happened?"

"What's with Star?" Cyborg added, his arms crossed, one eyebrow raised.

Robin shook his head as he collapsed into the nearest chair,

"I really messed up, huh?"

Cy and BB nodded in reply, they both of them taking their own seats on the couch.

"Damn..." Robin muttered, his eyes closed as his head lolled back on the chair, his chin pointing up at the ceiling.

"So...what happened?" Cyborg pressed, his elbows settled on his knees as he leaned forward.

The masked boy they called their leader, shook his head, the action appearing odd from his current position,

"She asked me."

"Asked you what?" Questioned the changeling, his bright eyes curious, _innocent_.

"...if I loved her."

Cyborg nodded, more to himself than to Robin, before standing, his body stiff.

"And what did you tell her?"

Robin could hear the edge in Cyborg's voice, and felt even worse. With a sigh, he looked away.

"I didn't answer. Not yes...Not no."

Cyborg nodded,

"I see. Well, you had better go fix it. Pick one. Tell her the truth." The robotic teen left with those last words, his metal attire clunking against the floor as he headed towards the kitchen. Beast Boy simply smiled uneasily before getting up and racing after him, leaving Robin alone.

* * *

The Boy Wonder sighed before lifting himself from his chair, his feet heading in the direction of the stairs. Everything below his knees seemed as though filled with led, his steps paced and slow as his mind raced.

Cyborg had been almost like a true, real brother for Raven and he had taken her death hard. Robin sighed loudly, one hand running through his dark hair as he tackled the stairs. He could remember a few nights afterward, during the early hours of the next day, when he couldn't sleep, he would pace the halls and hear the sound of Cyborg crying. It was during those occasions that Robin truly believed that he couldn't make it, that all hope was lost, shattered with the breaking of Cyborg's hard spirit.

Without realization of where he was, Robin felt his feet collide with something hard, yet hollow. He glanced up, and found himself face to face with Starfire's door. With a sigh, he knocked, allowing all of his thoughts to fade away.

"Who is there?" Starfire's voice seemed worn as it reached his ears, evidence that she was still crying. He sighed,

"It's me."

A long, loud silence followed before the rustling of blankets and other unknown things met his ears.

"Come in."

With not even the slightest amount of hesitance, Robin pressed the panel and the doors swung open. He was instantly greeted by many shades of vibrant pink. With a soft scowl, he shielded his eyes for a moment before entering.

"Robin?"

Starfire's eyes roamed over him uneasily, confusing written behind the puffy rimmed emeralds. Robin sighed and dropped his arm, his eyes locking onto her own.

"Can we talk."

Star looked away, "Of course."

Robin shook his head, his eyes glancing around at her eyesore of a room. With a nod, he made his decision and grabbed her by the wrist.

"Not here."

In an instant, he tugged her to her feet and towards the door. She didn't resist at all, just simply followed him out the door and down the hall, not stopping until they reached his room.

Robin pressed his own panel and the doors opened, quickly, he led her in. Starfire's dress swished around her hips as the metal slabs closed again, sending a draft over them.

The Boy Wonder lead them over to his bed. He sat on the black comforter and motioned for Starfire to sit beside him, his eyes set. She slowly took her spot beside him. Robin cleared his throat,

"Starfire...I...I can't answer you right now. Because I don't know...I don't know if I love you."

She nodded shortly, light sniffles and choppy breaths exiting her as she shook. Robin's eyes softened and he wrapped an arm around he shoulders, whispering words of apology.

"No," Starfire replied quietly, her eyes locking onto his, "It's not your fault..."

Robin shook his head, "Yes it is."

She looked away, her long locks of red hair falling around her face, "I love you..."

He looked over at her, not shocked at her admittance, but not at ease. He knew the reply she was silently hoping for...but he also knew that he couldn't give it to her...and she knew it too.

Slowly, Star positioned herself so that she was facing him, her arms sneaking around his neck before tugging him closer.

"Starfire..."

"I will make you love me. I do not care about anything else."

And with that, she pressed her pink lips to his pale ones. Robin felt himself melt, his eyes rolling back into his head as she ran her tongue across his low lip. Lust began to boil in his groin and before he could make a wise decision, both he and Starfire were leaning backward, and his fingers were working at the zipper of her dress.

* * *

**Well...thats it...sorry...hope it was atleast ok. Review please!**


	5. Undo the Undone

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 5:** **_Undo the Undone_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBegining_

**DISCLAIMER:** _I _**DONT**_ OWN, YOU _**DONT**_ SUE!_

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

* * *

Red, flowing locks of hair weaved with ebony atop a yellow pillow, the radiant cherry tresses capping a forehead flushed with passion. Starfire's heavily lidded eyes stared up at the ceiling, Robin's arm draped across her bare, sweat dewed stomach. She glanced over at his face, her full lips slightly parted. His beautiful green eyes were hidden from her, his supple breathing caressing her neck.

Star lost herself in the moment, her emeralds shinning in the dim light. It had been only a short while since they had finished, but she wanted him again; she _needed_ him again.

The peach of her lower lip began to quiver and the alien girl began to sob quietly.

_"I will make you love me. I do not care about anything else."_

She shifted her gaze from her lover's dreaming face and focused on the article-covered wall to her side. Newspaper clippings stared back at her, columns of crime and peril written in black and white. She sighed sadly, her eyes glazed with a far away aspect.

She was beginning to sound like her disgrace of a sister; beginning to adapt the same disregard for all desires but her own. The Tamaranian shivered at the thought, her fingers tugging Robin's white sheet over her exposed torso.

A blameworthy memory that she had been trying to ignore for what seemed like an eternity suddenly crawled into her mind, its strong fingers linking around and taking her attention.

_"Starfire, nak i loyach frech yech yie."_

The orange-skinned girl closed her tearing eyes, her bottom lip held between two rows of teeth.

"Starfire, take care of him for me," Her voice was a soft whisper, her chest rising and falling with trembling sobs.

She recalled one of her mediation times with Raven, where the dark girl had tried to teach her some of Azarath's native language.

_

* * *

_

_"Alright Star," Raven monotoned slowly, her eyes holding a semblance of boredom, "Try again. What is, 'Sky'?"_

_The alien smiled brightly, her mouth spread in a wide grin, "Renyach!"_

_Raven sighed and massaged the bridge of her nose, Starfire's giddiness becoming something of an annoyance._

_"Good. Now 'Cloud'."_

_"Sine!"_

_"Correct. 'By'?"_

_"Ach?"_

_"Yes."_

_"GLORIOUS!"_

_Raven shook her head but couldn't help but smile a little, her eyes closed, her hood shading her face._

_"I think you've got it."_

_Starfire beamed, her eyes wide with excitement as she clasped her hands in front of her chest. With a loud cry of joy, she launched into the air, her body buzzing with green electricity as she flew swiftly around the room._

_Raven just arched a hidden eyebrow at the display, her head beginning to ache._

_"Oh Friend Raven, you have brought the splendor of achievement upon me! I am forever grateful!"_

_It's no big deal." The young Azarathian replied blandly, her amethyst eyes dull as she watched her fellow team member continue to zoom around her tomb of a room, "We're done for today. I have to meditate. See ya, Star."_

_Starfire stopped quickly, her eyes blinking a few times as she stared down at her friend._

_"Then, you do not wish for me to carry out 'the meditation' with you today, Friend Raven?" _

_The emotionless Titan sighed heavily, her legs crossed elegantly as she hovered over her ebony blanketed bed, her eyes closed in concentration._

_"Not today Star. I need to be alone."_

_Starfire's aura drooped, her form slowly descending back to the floor,_

_"If that is your wish, then I will not displease you."_

_Raven cracked open an eye and shook her head,_

_"See you tomorrow. Same time. Study."_

_The orange girl's eyes brightened and she nodded, a large, Cheshire smile on her face as she turned and left the room._

* * *

Tears rolled down Starfire's face in rivers, her lips and nostrils plagued with it. She wiped them away with her fingers, her tongue sneaking out and swiping the salt from her peach folds.

What was she doing?

Star glanced over at the 18-year-old boy beside, fresh tears boiling in her already red rims. Raven had entrusted her to take care of him, and how had she repaid her; by sleeping with him. She shook her head in shame, silent whimpers shaking her delicate body.

"I am not a good friend."

* * *

Cyborg stood motionlessly on the metal roof, his feet a little ways from the edge as he stared out along the horizon, his real eye devoid of all emotion.

Raven had loved it up here, loved the peace and quiet. It was the only real place, besides her room, where she could truly be alone. He remembered the time where he had found her and Robin on the roof, both of them completely soaked from the rain.

She had stood so poised then, one hand stretched out as black energy danced around her fingertips. Her bright eyes had been so totally focused, tinted with emotions that threatened to pour out. Cyborg had been so entranced that he momentarily forgot about the crippled team leader lying at his feet.

And yet, even at the moment he came back to reality, and anger started burning through his veins, he could still sense her understanding of peace, of serenity. The heat and hate thriving inside of her did nothing to bruise her aura of self-control, her semblance of dignity and grace.

Cyborg smiled softly, not even Sparrow had been able to take that from her. Through all the pain and suffering, Raven had never let herself fully go, not until her daemon transpired. The robot teen shook his head, his arms dead by his sides.

Even after the monster had ripped from her body, Raven still seemed to have it held within her power, she had still been able to command it. Sparrow had even realized it.

_"Daemon or not, my sister obviously still lingers in you."_

Cy collapsed to knees, his body refusing to hold itself up any longer.

He was tired, just so damn tired.

Tired of being a robot, tired of being a Titan, tired of being without Raven; Just plain tired of being tired.

The cool wind of the night blew over him gingerly, its caress waking him from his reverie.

He had let her down. He hadn't trusted her when she needed him to the most. He let her die, he just sat back and watched it happen, not tried to stop it...just watched.

"Raven..." He breathed hoarsely, "I'm sorry..."

"No."

Cyborg's real eye stretched as wide as it could, his lungs stalling as he registered the responder's voice, too afraid to turn and find nothing. A gentle hand suddenly rested on his shoulder, its appearance small and fragile. The gray fingers squeezed at his metal casing tenderly, the act that of encouragement, of reassurance.

With his heart in his throat, Cyborg turned to face the one now beside him. His robotic and seeing eyes locked onto a pair of dull violets, shades of faded emotion creeping up behind them.

"Raven..."

She smiled softly, the corners of her eyes crinkling with the rising of her cheeks. With ease, she lowered herself to her knees, her head a foot or more below Cyborg's. He stared down at her in awe, his mouth suddenly dry,

"How di-"

Sorrow stung through her irises, her head shaking slowly,

"I told you I wasn't going to die. Didn't you believe me?"

Her question wasn't exactly what he would call a real one, her tone sarcastic as ever.

"No," He replied, scratching the back of his neck, "I guess I didn't."

Raven nodded, her eyes focused on the rolling waves before them,

"It's alright. No one else did either." Her bland monotone echoed through his ears slowly,

almost as though trying to reassure him that she was really there.

Cyborg studied down at her figure. A shredded white robe graced her agile and flawless curves, the breeze sending its skirt fanning out behind her heals.

"Aren't you cold?"

She glanced up at him, her hair sweeping to the side with another gust of wind.

"No."

He nodded, "Alright."

They sat in silence, a surreal understanding passing between the both of them as they studied the rolling waters surrounding the island.

"Uhh, Rae?"

"Yes?"

"Don't you wanna, you know, go see the rest of the team?"

A weird aura seemed to wash over her with his question, the air dropping in temperature slightly. She glanced up, her eyes littered with the black sky's stars. Spite her lack of excitement, she still seemed to hold a sense of anxiety.

"The team..."

Cyborg felt his eyebrow nit in pity, his head shaking,

"We're real sorry we couldn't save you Rae. All of us."

Her gaze landed on him, her eyes ice cold,

"It wasn't your guy's fault."

The robotic teen looked away, the wind sending a shiver down his spine,

"We couldn't save you. I couldn't sa-"

"Enough." She stood with her order, her bare feet numb against the cold metal of the rooftop. Cy stared at her, obedient.

"Cyborg, you did nothing wrong," a comforting hand placed itself on his bicep, "It's fine."

"Let's go inside."

A hint of a smile graced Raven's lips and she nodded, helping the robot Titan to his feet.

"Alright, Cy, alright."

* * *

Raven stared around the living room silently, her eyes remembering as her ears listened for something new. The familiar smell of couch material and carpet wafted through her nose, igniting the old, timeless feeling of home within her body.

"It hasn't changed." She stated to the half-robot behind her, the depths of her violets innocent as she cast them over the room, taking in the memories. Cyborg watched her sadly, noticing how she kept herself from look at the wall she had hurled him into. He placed a large, sturdy hand on her shoulder,

"Welcome home, Raven."

"Dude, Cyborg...where is all the tofu! Did you throw...it...out again."

Beast Boy stared, wide eyed, at the pair, a pink apron wrapped around his waist as his arms hung limply by his sides.

"RaeRaven!"

He rubbed his eyes with oven-mitt covered hands, the pupils dilating in shock when he realized that she was, indeed, there. In a flash, he transformed into a dog and bounded on top of her, knocking her to the floor.

Raven lay on her back as Beast Boy ravished her in licks, his tail wagging furiously while he yipped and barked. She groaned, partly from pain, partly from annoyance, before Cyborg removed the "playful" tyke and set him on the floor.

Beast Boy let out a final bark before shifting back, Raven already climbing to her feet.

"Hello. Beast Boy." Her voice was bland, yet a hint of irritancy plagued it, her eyes fierce as she glanced at the Changeling.

_'Just like old times.' _Cyborg smirked at the thought, his arms crossed as she stared down at BB.

"Yo, hurry up and finish with dinner, I'm starving."

The green, furred boy rolled his eyes at his fellow, male teammate before heading back to the kitchen, whistling. Raven shook her head before brushing her dress off,

"Sure is nice to be home," Fake sarcasm dripped from each syllable and Cy couldn't help but chuckle. But, the rare moment only lasted a minuet,

"Where are Robin and Starfire?" Raven asked suddenly, her eyes glancing around. Cyborg paled.

"Cy? Are you...alright?"

He shook his head, before quickly coming to his senses and nodding,

"Yea, Rae. I'm fine."

She arched an eyebrow but accepted his answer, her mind busy with other matters.

"He's in his room, isn't he," She stated, her feet already heading towards the stairs.

"Um, Rae…Rae!"

She turned around, one foot placed on the first step.

"What?"

Cyborg coughed before clearing his throat, sweat dripping down the back of his neck. The last he had heard of Robin was his voice, muffled as it met his ears through his closed door. Starfire's voice had also been heard.

"Uhh. Don't you wanna...eat first!" His voice cracked, his pitch running high and he blushed. Raven arched and eyebrow before continuing up the stairs.

"I'll be back in a minuet. Put of pot of water on the stove."

Cyborg bit his lip but turned around and set off towards the kitchen. She would have to find out soon or later.

* * *

Raven's light feet crept across the dark hall silently, her eyes set on the door that read, 'Robin'.

_'Robin...'_

She paused outside his door, before fading through the metal chunk, the black of her power vanishing behind her.

Raven scanned the ebony trodden room, her hands fumbling together as she stumbled around. The sound of his harsh breathing was intoxicating, and Raven found her cheeks grow hot.

One full year away, and her love for him hadn't died a spark.

The darkness seemed to call out to her, lulling her to her slumbering lover-

"AHHHH!"

Raven screeched loudly, her face contorted in pain as she lifted her leg, her fingers wrapping around her injured foot.

_'Damn wall!"_

The lights instantly snapped on and in a panic, raven glanced around, looking for a hiding spot. What she found, was an open closet, its door open just wide enough for her to fit thought. In an instant, she was safely secured inside the closet, her fingers tugging the door shut.

"What?" She heard Robin ask groggily, obviously half asleep.

Raven sighed silently, relief evident on her shadowed face. A large scowl suddenly spread over her perfect lips.

_'Why...am I hiding?'_

She rolled her eyes and shuffled slightly, her pupils catching the slanted panel design of the door in front of her. Light leaked through the thin, open strips, casting lines of light over her blank face.

"What is going on?"

Raven's eyebrows knitted in confusion at the sound of Starfire's voice, and she leaned closer to the door, her eyes peering through one of the open panels. Light glared into her violets, forcing her to squint.

Robin sat facing her, rubbing his eyes with his fists. A deep blush spread over Raven's cheeks, the realization that he was naked fully setting in. She bit her lower lip to keep from smiling.

Starfire suddenly sat up from behind him, a thin sheet slipping from her torso. Raven felt her lungs stop, her kohl lashes fanning out with the stretching of her eye lids, her mouth open in disbelief, her heart suddenly shattered.

"Robin? What was that weird noise?"

The Boy Wonder shrugged, his head turned in an odd angle so that he could see the alien behind him.

"Beast Boy must have walked into the wall again."

Starfire's face twisted into a look of uncertainty,

"But it sounded as thought it came from inside."

Robin smiled at her softly,

"Don't worry about it, your safe with me."

Star felt immense guilt spread through her stomach, her eyes sinking in Robin's green jewels. He smiled and she felt her body burst into a fit of desire, a sly smirk suddenly toying on her lips.

Robin chuckled and maneuvered himself back under the covers, a leg of his swinging over Starfire's hips. With a wink, he straddled her down. She giggled softly before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down; Their lips met. Robin closed his eyes and their lust intensified, his hands blinding reaching for the blankets. Once victorious, he pulled them fully over his body and his lover's.

Slick tears ran down Raven's cheeks as she gnawed on her low lip, the force of her bite drawing blood. She pushed herself away from the door, her body falling back into Robin's collection of clone uniforms. She tumbled to her bottom loudly, many of the red, yellow and black suits crashing down on top of her.

She heard Star gasp and Robin rip back the covers, his feet soon meeting the floor. Cries of desperation began to flee from her lips as she fought with the tangled costumes, which refused to unwind from her figure.

"Who's in there!" Robin called through the door before pulling it to the side, his eyes landing on the moving pile of uniforms.

"Robin?" Star called from the bed, the sheets held tight around her body.

"Show yourself!" The Boy Wonder ordered, his hands ripping the collection of super outfits from the pile and throwing them over his shoulder.

Raven reached a hand out and attempted to push him away, her eyes red rimmed, her face blotchy. Robin grasped her wrist tightly and wrenched her from the tangle, his body twisting as he threw her on the floor, her bottom landing atop a few scattered suits.

He turned fully, a set of yellow boxers hiding his naked form from her site. Raven hid her face in her hands, violet hair hanging around her head like a curtain.

"Who do you work for?" he questioned loudly, a finger pointed in her direction accusingly.

She sniffled softly, attempting to pull herself together. She had promised herself a long time ago that she would no longer be weak, and she was not about to break that vow yet.

"Answer me."

Raven removed her wet hands slowly and looked up at him, her eyes cold,

"You tell me."

Robin felt his heart stop, his newly masked eyes wide with cynicism,

"Raven."

* * *

**Well...that was terrible...but i was in a hurry and its late..i'll fix it up later...though i hope it wasnt too horrid, review please!**


	6. Dont Say A Word

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 6: _Dont Say A Word_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

**DISCLAIMER:** _I** dont** own Teen Titans...I know...I thoughtI did too.._

_**(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)**_

_

* * *

_

_Faded wood glared back at Raven as she sat huddled in the corner, her eyes glancing around the room she had grown to know so well. She shivered and tugged what remained of her robe around her body, trying to warm herself up. She glanced over at the chalk markings on the far wall; tears welled in her eyes._

_A year...and counting._

_Raven checked her body over, noticing that she was mostly healed; all that remained was a deep gash in her upper arm. Robin's wounds had been far more serious than she had realized. With a groan, she climbed to her feet, her eyes locking onto the door._

_One year of being alone, cold, weak, hungry, and she was finally ready to leave. Her stomach had shut down after the wounds spread over her body, giving her enough strength to recover. Raven had not tasted a shred of food in a year, and she was beginning to pay for it. _

_She turned to her lonely corner and smiled brokenly, her violet depths thick with loathing._

_"I hate this place." She muttered before walking to the door. Her feet halted an inch away from freedom and she inhaled deeply, attempting to suppress the anxiety growing within her. With a final nod of her head, she wrapped a hand around the doorknob. A second later, she twisted and pushed, allowing the door to slam against the outside wall, the sun's light stinging her eyes..._

* * *

The anger behind Raven's violets was far too great to hide and it spread through her nerves, igniting her body with the thirst for revenge. 

She had suffered so much for the man in front of her; she had given an entire year of her life up just so she could heal from the wounds of his that she had selflessly taken upon herself. Rage pounded against the walls of her mind, screaming and begging to be let loose. Fighting against it, her eyes shifted over to the Tamaranian.

_"Starfire, nak i loyach frech yech yie."_

Raven's blood boiled within her veins, her skin searing with fire as she battled to keep Rage at bay. Completely stiff, she stood and turned her back on them, her hands tightly fisted by her sides.

_'Azarath, Metrion, Zinthose...Azarath, Metrion, Zinthose...'_

"Raven." Robin called, a hand of his suddenly wrapped around her closest bicep. She froze, her eyes closed as a second pair of lids formed over the originals.

"What?" She asked hoarsely, her mantra repeating over and over in her head as she ripped her arm from his grasp. Fuck them both, she didn't need them.

He didn't reply and she cringed, her body swiftly leaving the room, and the lovers, in silence.

* * *

The rumble of thunder swallowed the Tower whole, flashes of lightening jolting past the windows in mad frenzies. Cyborg sat at the kitchen table nervously, his ears listening to the storm. He held his breath for minuets at a time as he awaited the screams and crying, he exhaled before breathing in. Oddly, no uproar of any kind ever came. 

Raven entered the room sometime later, newly adorned in her blue cloak, her face hidden by the shadow of her hood.

"Rae?"

"Yes." She monotoned, her hands busy with an empty cup and hot water filled kettle.

"Did...did you find them alright?"

He watched her visibly tense, her fingers wrapped around the kettle's handle equipped with white knuckles. She set it down with more force than he was sure she intended,

"Yes."

He nodded, "I see."

Raven grabbed her teacup and left quickly, her cloak fanning around her feet.

"I'll be in my room," she snapped whiletackeling the staircase. Raven could feel the frustration stirring in her chest as she claimed one step after the other, completely aware of he who stood at the top. She passed him with a semblance of casualty, her eyes set on her door.

"Raven. Stop."

Her feet halted and she waited, her eyes alive with anger and another emotion she refused to show.

"I don't want to discuss it, Robin."

He blinked at the harshness in her voice, her tone low and raspy, almost resembling that of her inner daemon's.

"It is not an option, Raven."

She tensed tightly, her shoulder blades aching, as well as the many muscles within her body, those in her legs, jamming. She ignored the pain,

"Who are you to give me orders?"

His eyes narrowed slightly, his hands fisting at his sides. He turned from the stairs to look at her, a scowl on his face,

"As long as you are a Titan, I am your leader. I out rank you!"

Robin's mouth refused to close after his outburst, his mind utterly shocked at the words, which just fled his lips. What was wrong with him? Had he whom had spent so many months of after her death confined from all the world, turned on his love...forgotten his love for her?

Raven began to glow with power, the many lights of the Tower flickered before blowing out. Window's shot open, and the outside storm flew inside the building, casting an eerie uneasiness over the entirety of the Titans. Thunder rolled and lightening danced across the sky, illuminating the many buildings of Jump City from site.

A low, growling rumble met Robin's ears, its gnarly tone filled with malice and anger, like a chuckle of Satan. It took The Boy Wonder only a few moments to realize that the sound was coming from Raven, she was laughing.

"Still a Titan..." She repeated coldly, her feet turning until she was facing he whom had hurt her so, two sets of red eyes shaded by her hood.

Robin stood sturdily with perfect posture, his face holding no semblance of fear. A flash of lightening banished all sight for a spare moment andRobin had to shield his eyes from the brillance, his ears whitewashed with the sound of its cracking thunder. When the electricity finally died away and the rumble faded, he dropped his arm to his side, only to find a glowering Raven in front of him. In shock, he stepped backwards.A loud, fearful gasp echoed from his throat when his foot found noground, the top stair falling a few inches below it.

Panic shot up Robin's spine and he flailed his arms out in a futile attempt to grab the railing. Raven's eyes grew wide and, acting on instinct, she reached out and grabbed his collar, tugging him safely away from the stairway. She let him drop to the floor, her eyes normal once again. Robin looked up, only to watch as she briskly left her before encasing herself within the confines of her room.

"Damnit!" He yelled angrily, one of his fists slamming into the floor. Robin lay there for a longmoment before propping himself up with his arms; dejectedly, he hung his head, "Damn..."

* * *

**I know,I know...it was really short, i'm sorry...but i was in a hurry to put something up and this was all i could manage at the moment. Anyways, i hope you enjoyed it. Looks like things are gonna be a little rocky between and Raven and Robin...hmmm...hehe...looks like fun for me in the future...oppsss...i had better be quiet...haha! Anyways, review please!**


	7. Unspoken

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 7:** **_Unspoken_**

**By:** _DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin_

_**SONG: Dont Speak**_

_**By: No Doubt**_

**_Lyrics in bold_**

**DISCLAIMER:** Oh honestly...read all the last chapters! And hell, how bout even those of the first part of this fic...then you can come back and recite it to me.

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

* * *

Swirls of red and violet danced in the unwilling eyes of the gutted avatar, her hair whipping around her face as a gust of wind billowed through her open window. Her previous discussion with her leader beat against the strong, concrete walls of her will, the futile and hurtful words spider webbing long cracks up the gray masses. They fell easily, grumbling to pieces. 

**You and me,  
We used to be together,  
Everyday together always...**

Raven let her form slip from it's hovering state, her rear landing on the ebony of her silk sheets. Green eyes illuminated her thoughts, smoothing them in an epiphany of drunken infatuation. She shook her head, snubbing the vision away. A scowl provoked temptation upon her lips, luring her to her door, placing her fingers upon the pad, her eyes watching the metal wedge open.

**I really feel,  
That I'm losing my best friend-**

Soft feet plagued the floor with sorrow, the heals of the boots dragging slightly on the stale carpet, almost attempting to draw her back into the solace of her room. Too late. The jewels of her eyes set themselves upon his name, the inscription bold and capital and some what intimidating. Nervous, she knocked.

The sound of her knuckles rapping against his door sent a small, frightened shiver up her spine, her mind mocking her with the thought of Starfire being inside as well. Heavy footsteps approached the door, the owner yawning loudly. Raven bit her lip, her eyes glancing around; she caught site of a clock, 3:00 AM.

**-I can't believe,  
This could be the end... **

The metal hiding the teen boy from her view was suddenly gone and her eyes locked onto his, those emeralds of sheer electricity boring through her soul.

Robin's lips parted in the shock of seeing her, his hair flat and unkempt against his head. Raven's heart choked in her throat, her hood covering the indigo of her hair as she looked away.

**It looks as though****you're letting go-**

"Raven? I-Is something wrong?"

**-And if it's real- **

Her eyes snapped back onto his, a warning sparking behind them as she plastered a semblance of indifference over her face.

"You were right. We need to talk."

He nodded, watching as her form turned and headed for the roof.

**-Well I don't want to know...**

Robin stepped from his room and jogged up to her, his feet meeting up with her droning and slow pace quickly.

The pair were silent until they reached the roof, the heavy wind tossing their hairwildly. The storm's suddenlyeye settled above them and an awkward stillness settled heavily upon their forms.

"Raven I-"

**Don't speak.  
I know just what you're saying,  
So please stop explaining ,  
Don't tell me cause it hurts.**

"Don't." She cut in harshly, her violets locking onto his greens. He succumbed to her wish, his jaw slightly clenched.

"I...I don't think you understand," She stole a glance at the sky, "Everything that I had to...to deal with because of you."

"But, Ra-"

**Don't speak.  
I know what you're thinking,  
I don't need your reasons,  
Don't tell me cause it hurts!**

"No."

Robin cast his eyes to the ocean that surrounded them, his interest catching on the rolling waves, shame exploding in his chest.

"And to think," Raven continued, bitterness thriving in her voice, "You once accused me of betrayal."

**Our memories.  
Well, they can be inviting,  
But some are altogether,  
Mighty frightening.**

Their eyes locked, passion, anger and something long since buried passing between them. Robin was rigid, his shoulders tense as his fists clenched by his sides,

"Raven...Don't accuse me of not caring. That's not true."

She scoffed at him, a pursed scowl on her lips, "Oh yea, Robin, I know. The display I walked in on earlier practically chiseled the amount of your grief in stone for me."

**As we die, both you and I,  
With my head in my hands,  
I sit and cry.**

Sarcasm leaked from every syllable of her cruel words and Robin sent her a hard glare, his eyes narrowed dangerously.

"What do you want from me Raven? I thought you were dead! Did you expect me to grieve after you forever? Did you not want me to move on, to be happy?"

**Don't speak.  
I know just what you're saying,  
So please stop explaining,  
Don't tell me cause it hurts, no, no, no. **

Raven turned her back on him, anger burning in the endless depths of her soul and eyes. Cautious sparks of power wove around the lithe fingers of her hands. She hated him; hated him because he was right. Selfishly, she had harbored the need to keep his love just for herself...she had refused to believe that he should heal, refused to want him to move on. Tears burned in the corners of her eyes; her will to hurt him for hurting her, breaking down before her being. She was such a fool.

"No, Robin. The only thing I hadever wished forwas your happiness." She lied.

Robin's eyes softened, as well as his tone, "Then...why are you so angry?"

**It's all ending,  
I gotta stop pretending who we are,  
You and me I can see us dying...are we? **

How could she answer him? Her figure quivered, wind raking over the pair as she stalled within her thoughts. A cracking whip of lightning dashed across the sky, casting them into a shadow of brillance. Emotions flickered behind her eyes, all heavy with defeat. Power crackled around her body, outlining her in an errie glow. No matter how correct he was, she still loved him, and it hurt her to think of his own love for her settled on someone else. She was back now. Didn't that change anything?

Her eyes narrowed at her childish thoughts, cold, harsh reality settling in. And, with a nagging shame, she did something that she vowed to never, never do again. She read his thoughts.

Raven's head shot back from the force of her invasion, memories flashing before her eyes. For a moment, Robin was in the soliace of his dark room, huddled in the corner, crying; the next, red lights were flashing, marking numbers thatindicated time as they danced over his sweaty skin; his face was hidden in his hands, Starfire peacefulysleeping beside him.

**Don't speak.  
I know just what you're saying,  
So please stop explaining,  
Don't tell me cause it hurts, no, no, no...**

Raven inhaled deeply, the air scratching against her throat as it dove in. She shook as the visions fadded away, finding herself in the arms of the man whom she loved. She inwardly smiled, though immediatly disgusted at herself for doing so. He still loved her.

She glanced up at him, her hair soaked and twisted to snarles by the new rain that had begun to fall. Tears mingled with the cool drops of the sky's assult; whether they were from the pain of her previous experence or of happiness, she didn't know. His eyes were wide in worry, his lips parted slightly.

"Are you alright?" He cried over the cackling wind, rain water dripping down the sides of his face. She nodded before turning her head away, her teeth settled over her bottom lip. Black energy wrapped around her figure, pulling him from his arms and seting her upright.

Raven fought away her joy with a hard, screaming hatred for herself.

"I'm sorry." She whispered, allowing it to regester inside his mind as well as in his ears. A sigh fled her lips, the small sound ripped apart by the raging storm. Raven closed her eyes, another round of lightning stealing all sight of the navy sky. The floor turned ebony as the flash died away, and she vaised through it.

Robin stood motionless, her words tracing the drums of his ears, tainting his skin with burns of dishonor.

'She shouldn't have to be.'

* * *

Beast Boy smiled widely as he and Cyborg prepared breakfast, no cause of argument between the two stirring up yet. Starfire sat at the table, oddly gloomily and hushed, her hair hiding her face from their view. Tension seemed to ride the atmosphere of the dismal Tower, scratching up the walls with more tally-marks of rebuke. 

Robin entered the kitchen loudly, his feet scuffing against the tile floor before he pulled out his chair and sat, newspaper in hand. With a demeanor of unease, he snapped the paper open and began reading, no wishes of a good morning to any of them fleeing his lips.

**Don't speak.  
I know what you're thinking,  
I don't need your reasons,  
Don't tell me cause it hurts.**

Raven was next to enter, her body floating gracefully around the kitchen area, her fingers snatching up a teakettle and mug. She filled the tin pot with warm water before setting it on an open burner. Her and Beast Boy's eyes locked and he smiled, the tips of his fingers sliding down and twisting the knob. Blue flames crawled from the dark depths and snuck up the sides of the kettle, lapping at it with sheer vigor. Raven nodded a curt 'thank you' before sitting down in the chair beside Starfire.

**Don't tell me cause it** **hurts!**

The Tamaranian visibly tensed, her head lifting slightly as she locked her eyes onto the profile of her fellow female Titan. She twiddled her thumbs nervously, her form suddenly flinching as Beast Boy set down a plate of hash browns. Her green eyes skipped around the room before resting upon the agile form of Raven once again, anxiety of the silence pushing her over the edge. She just_had _to set things right, the guilt was becoming farto much for her to bear. She required Raven's forgiveness, no, she _needed_ it; the known hurting of her best friend was beyond the searingpain of guilt. In a fit of tears, she wrapped her arms around the daemon girl and wept.

"Oh, Friend Raven, I am so sorry!" She cried, her hair falling over Raven's shoulder in a watherfall of ruby waves. The Azarathian's eyes stretched wide in shock as she glanced down at the sobbing girl resting on her shoulder. Starfire's fingers dug into Raven's ribs as she held her tighter,

**I know what you're saying,  
So_ please_ stop explaining...**

"I am not a good friend," She whimpered; all the Titans' eyes locked onto the rare and sudden display of feeling.

"Please...Please," the redhead begged, "Forgive me."

**Don't speak,  
don't speak,  
don't speak...**

Raven felt her throat clog with a mixture of feelings, the horrid thingsmuting her voice. She reached out a quaveringhand and stroked Star's hair softly, the deamon avatar's eyes shut in uncertainty.

"I-," She forced out, the muscles of her esophagus constricting painful in her unwillingness of showing tears, "It's alright."

Starfire glanced up, streaks of tears blotching her perfect complexion, her eyes wide in disbelief. Quickly, she removed her clinging hands and wrapped them around one of Raven's own. Drawing the gray digits up to her cherry lips, Starfire kissed them each in turn, performing the ritual of undying gratitude practiced by her people.

"Thank you, Friend" She cried happily, her voice cracking. The heavy weight of guilt lifted from her shoulders gracefully.

"Oh, Thank you."

**Hush, hush darlin' Hush, hush...**

Raven nodded and the Tamaranian rose from her spot by the table and left the room. She floated up the stairs, her mind heavy with the knowledge of what she must do. This thing, this loveless affair with Robin, had to end.

**-hush, hush...**

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**I know, i know...you hate me for waiting so long to update and then adding this short chapter...well sorry, but school is kinda choatic right now and im absolutly racing the clock to try and raise some of my grades. I do hope to add much more frequently when summer arrives though, so please, dont lose faith, just wait a bit longer! Review Please!**

**P.S. I updated this slightly...so that it runs a bit differently...um...so for those who read it before it was updated, its important that you re-read the part with Raven and Robin...but thats it, and only if you want to, thanks!**


	8. Alone

**Loyalty**

**Chapter 8:** **_Alone_**

**By: **_DeathIsOnlyTheBegingin_

**Disclaimer: I dont own Teen Titans...I swear.**

_(Enjoy! Read and Review Please!)_

* * *

White shone through the essence of darkness, solitude playing through the black room as a shadowed figure sat upon the dark sheets of his bed. Robin's legs hung over one of the sides, his feet touching the floor, the point of his elbows propped upon the bend of his knees. He held his face in his hands, staring blandly at the wall, buried deep within the toils of his thoughts. He pondered his current situation with much care, weighing out each problem in attempt to find a place where options and crisis balanced. So far, he had come up empty handed. He sighed as he massaged his temples, the red glow of his alarm clock the only marking to outlining the placement of his silhouette. 

Raven. She was a solid mystery; her mind, her thoughts, her workings. One giant puzzle was the consistency of her making and it frustrated him. Robin wasn't used to not being able to figure someone out; such was an instinct that usually flowed within him, but with her, it completely disappeared. There were so many twists and crooks in her past and upbringing that the one whom ever truly _did _figure her out, would need to have already held no space within their mind to learn of anything other. A groan of hopelessness left Robin's throat and he let his head hang, his hands dropping and dangling between the part of his knees. Such thoughts were futile; they would never help him to know her.

A shrill knock suddenly thundered through the room and he tensed, his instincts for danger caught off their guard. He turned his head to the door, eyes heavy with tired emotions as he studied the metal entry.

"Who's there?" he muttered loudly, one hand ruffling through his unruly locks of dark hair. A pause of silence met his ears before a soft reply swallowed the white quiet,

"It is Starfire. May I come in?"

Robin sighed, his shoulders sagging as he looked away. There was something in her voice that he could not place, its alien presence snapping a new guilt alive within his heart.

"Yes."

Upon his reply the door swung open, revealing Star's fidgeting form. The soft red glow of his digital clock did not reach her and she stood, unmoving, in the darkness. He listened as she floated into the room, her form breaking the stillness the hovering air provided. Light suddenly flooded into every corner of the space named his as she switched on the lamp, which sat on his toiled desk. He glanced over at her as she made her way to his bed, settling herself beside him with a plop.

"Robin...W-we need to talk."

Once again, that faint sound of unfamiliarity rang in her voice and he swallowed hard, trying to drown the relentless feeling within his chest. Robin looked at her, giving her the well-mannered respect of eye contact; she deserved it after all he had put her through.

Realizing that he would make no objection, Starfire continued, "I-I do not think that we should...should be a _pair_ anymore, my friend," her eyes pleaded with him, "It would be wrong."

Robin nodded in understanding, his eyes adverting from her gaze as the cruel emotion thriving inside him rose to choke his voice. He caught the sound of her sigh and, once again, gave her his attention. Starfire studied him with intense sorrow, her ruby locks hued brilliantly by the soft glow of his clock. She looked away, her throat moving in the action of swallowing.

"Please. Say something." She requested softly, her eyes locked onto the bland color of his wall. Robin looked down at his feet,

"I-I don't know _what_ to say." He replied honestly, his wild hair hiding the whites of his masked eyes. Star's gaze settled upon him, both emeralds deep with something akin to pity. She wrapped her arms around him warmly.

"Do not worry, Robin. I will always be a true friend to you." Starfire promised dearly, her embrace caring and civil, unlike those of her usual gifting. Robin only succeeded in feeling worse; he didn't deserve her friendship.

"Thank you," He managed, his arms lightly wrapping back around her as he returned her hug. Starfire nodded, her chin brushing against his shoulder with the movement. After a few moments, they parted and she stood, her small feet hovering slightly above the floor.

"I must go and perform the act of bed ready-ing. Goodnight, Friend Robin."

She blew him a kiss before smiling and departing, the door swinging shut behind her. Robin closed his eyes and buried his face in his hands.

* * *

Shaded by a cloak of darkness, Raven sat upon her bed, dark eyes swirling in thought. The dark material of the comforter surrounding her sat balled and twisted within the tense fingers of her shaking fists. The woe and guilt of her current ungodly situation ate at the core of her being, its leering essence wrapping cold cords round her soul and pulling tight. She winced, the regret constricting and suffocating her will. 

A dark cloud lay upon Raven's shoulders as she contemplated the meaning of her existence. Mysterious and void, it consumed her sanity like a plague, its entirety swallowing the very life from her body until she was nothing but an empty corpse. Her gaze sullened; she was nothing more than a shell of what she used to be.

"Sparrow was right..." Raven surrendered, her powerful walls of stubborn resolve crumbling to the solid demeanor of truth, "I am pathetic..."

A bitter chuckle crept into the dark corners of her room, the shrill form of cold laughter quavering from Raven's own lungs. She felt her eyes burn and shook her head, a large, eerie smile playing upon her lips. Perhaps Trigon would be so kind as to kill her; he must have long since heard of her brothers demise; Why was he taking so long to seek revenge?

Raven's face screwed up in disgust and she spat at the floor, her father's horrid memory lacing the bitter taste of resentment along the back of her tongue. That _thing _had deceived her mother, ruined her childhood, destroyed her best friend, nearly demolished the Titans, and damn near killed her; Trigon was truly the devil, if not his son. A dozen books flew through the air and smashed through the window; millions of tiny shards of glass fell to the rocks below.

Raven inhaled sharply, her eyes spreading wide; what was she _becoming_? She glanced down at her hands and studied the gray of her palms; their many lines and prints stared back up at her. Maybe she had been _wrong_; perhaps she really _was_ the evil one. Violet eyes squeezed shut and hands became fists, each shaking violently as Raven fought the sobs, which so desperately clung to the brink of her control; more books began to rise into the air, along with many other trinkets and objectiles of Raven's possession.

Black power rose from the pores of Raven skin and buzzed about her, the electricity dangerously vivid and complex. She breathed in deeply, tears brewing upon the buds of her lashes and tracing their way to the corners of her sealed eyes. A gut wrenching realization jolted through her being and Raven gritted her teeth, shaking her head; If she _had_ indeed been wrong... that meant that she most assuredly_ would _destroy what she had been created to destroy.

Raven's breathing hitched; Would _she_ be the one to drag Azarath to the edge of its precious extinction? Would _she_ cast it deep into the Abyss from which her father was formed?

Raven placed her hands on the sides of her head before shaking it. Her mind ached with thought and worry, and oh how she wished it would stop.

A sharp knock upon the door roused Raven from her mental anguish and she let her hands fall, her head snapping in the direction of the entry as the many flying objectiles fell to the floor. White noise crackled within her ears at the new, deafening silence; another knock.

"Who is it?" Raven monotoned coldly, her body quivering in the aftermath of her emotions.

"Cyborg."

"Hold on."

Raven place her feet upon the floor and stood, tugging her hood over her head and letting out a shaky, calming breath. She roamed to the door quickly and cracked it open, allowing the visitor a glimpse of her eye.

"What do you want?" she asked bluntly, a facade of annoyance hiding her broken spirit. Cyborg stared at her softly, a low sigh finally fleeing his lips.

"To talk. Can I come in?"

Raven stared at him for a long moment before pushing the door open wider and stepping aside. Cy nodded and entered, his boots clicking lightly on the hard floor. Raven closed the door behind him and flew to her bed, settling herself onto woven legs.

"What is it?"

Cyborg scratched the back of his neck at the enquiry and shrugged, "How are ya holdin' up?"

Raven spared him an odd glare before sighing, "I'll be fine. I always am."

Cyborg nodded, before glancing around and lifting his eyebrow, "Redecorating?"

Raven scanned the room quickly, her cool demeanor faltering slightly. Articles of clothing, books, statues, and many other odd, miscellaneous things lay scattered over her floor as the result of her spurring emotions. She shrugged in reply,

"No. Spring cleaning."

Cyborg snorted, "Obviously."

Raven felt herself grow defensive, "What did you really come here for, Cyborg?"

He glanced over at her, sighing once again, "What are you going to do?"

Raven blinked a few times, her mind hurtling into a vast stupor with his sudden question. She hung her head, ashamed with herself once again. She couldn't expect Robin to leave Starfire, and she couldn't bear to stay and watch the display...but she, herself, also couldn't leave; this was her home and they were still the friends she loved, whether she was angry with them or not.

"I don't know." She replied honestly, her dull eyes staring at the floor. Cyborg nodded to himself before turning and walking to the door. He craned his neck to look at her as he place his finger down upon the power pad.

"You know," He smiled softly, "I didn't reallyexpect you _too_ know."

With the sound of and opening and shutting door, he was gone and Raven was left alone once more. She lifted her head and stared at the door, her eyes watering; She was_ always _the one to be left alone.

* * *

**Yes i know...it was short...i'm sorry...but it was all i could do for the moment...(sigh) You'll have to forgive me...I'm going through a bit of a tough time right now and writing seems to be becoming less and less inspired...and more of a dull reminder of something i used to be happydoing...(another sigh) dont worry though...i shall try to update soon...i just have to wait for my motivation to return. Until the next chapter...**

**- Death**


	9. Message to my Fans

Hello everyone.

I know it's been an eternity since I have last updated this story, and to be quite frank with you all – I do not care if you are angry. Now, before that goes over badly- let me explain why.

This story and its first half, Blinding Light, are terribly written. They are trash, really.

In a way, I'm proud of how they progressed, as well as their overall effect, considering I was 13/14 when I wrote them. However, that is all I am proud of (besides the creation of Sparrow, naturally) because other than those few things… they are dreadful. And you, my loyal reviewers, who have stuck with me from rubbish to gold to nothing, deserve better.

So.

I am re-writing Blinding Light. It's going to be more complete, more believable, more exciting, more in-character, and better written. If you enjoyed the original, then I strongly, STRONGLY suggest that you read the re-write. It is going to be different in most ways, but the major plot of the story is still intact, as well as the pairing. I really, truly believe you won't be disappointed.

Anyway, the first chapter is already completed and I'm working on the second now. I'm going to post the re-write under the name "All Who Are Mortal" So if you are looking, that is what you need to search.

Also-

I really want to take a moment to thank you all for your support over the years. You are all so inspirational and you do so much for the writers on this site. Reviewing is really important, for authors and readers alike- I cannot tell you how many stories I have read and passed over due to the overall reception of the readers. You people are more powerful than you know, and I applaud you.

I hope to see you all in the future. I understand that a lot of you are angry with me, and I realize that some of you are hurt- I apologize... for my absence, for my neglect. But my young life has taken many twists and plummets these past two/three years. I am not the same person, I am not the same writer, I am not the same optimist – But I am just as powerful, just as profound, and just as capable of thrilling and breaking your hearts as I was before.

Accompany me on this journey, and you will want for nothing.

The time has come,

Death


End file.
